i accidentally drew out one thousand dollars from the atm cuz i pressed the wrong button. i was horrified. it's scary to walk around with twenty 50 dollar bills in your wallet. i finally went to genghis khan but feel like i've been cheated. i slurped up an enormous oyster. i almost couldn't stand the fishy taste, so i added a lot of tabasco sauce. methinks i'm not a buffet person.
saw a rather racist article from detail magazine on the net. it's making a lot of hoopla. there's even a petition to sign. really, what editor will let this go to print?

am getting more and more conflicted about engineering.

driving was fun. but i'll have to wait until the end of next month for my next lesson. i rented a couple of dvds and watched them all. elizabeth, frida, in the bed room, he loves me, he loves me not and iris. that's like 3 heavy drama biopics. i'm feeling all groggy already. i also downloaded a nirvana concert. really quite smashing, except i don't know half the songs they did. and fyi, this was a post-for-posting's-sake post.

yay! i managed to book a driving practical later this afternoon! hurray for me
brunei is next next week and i still have stuff to buy from beach road. dunno where my number lock is. i went for a horrible range conducted by another coy on thurs. the specs say they get treated like dogs. the csm fall the specs in and tell us to pick up empty catridges and let the men sit down. the pc scream at us for no reason. but good thing is it was at mandai. mandai range's the best. the toilet's so clean i dared to shit there. but the canteen closes very early.

i'm supposed to be in charge of cleaning the vehicle shed. it's shitty, literally. the birds defecate all over every day. i got advance pay today. must not spend it unneccessarily on more cds. the other day i went to borders and they had the shins. decided not to buy after all. my friend aru bought the courtney love cd. haha. she's a real stuntman.

every time i think i dislike somebody in camp they redeem themselves partially so i don't dislike them so much. my ps thinks i'm not doing my job properly. we had another confrontation recently. fuck man. he makes me so depressed. he talks a lot of crap. and asks us how to improve the situation. i want to tell him that i don't care anymore. seriously ns is not for me. god knows why people want to sign on to get fucked. i really hope life is different outside.

i got my new spectacles today and i shall only wear it when i go out. it looks er i dunno, weird. i miss talking to old faces a lot. out of 99 mesages in my inbox only 4 are from a female. that's cheow.

i don't usually like wittier-than-thou quotes but i like this one
t.s. eliot -
We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time

sorry if i keep harping on the tshirt thing but it's so exciting to talk about it. i'll call my brand antidote. and the slogan will be like "antidote will save us all" (like chicks on speed) "aNtidote will save your style" haha.. and they have cool names like [01 heart of glass] which looks amateurish and [02 copabacana!] which isn't made yet. it's good day dreaming

i coerced my family to go to the modliving shop today but didn't dare enter cuz no one was inside. if you ever wanted a place to hang out and chill i suggest the rooftop garden there, accessible by either a lift or a steep and narrow spiral staircase. also bring alcohol of your choice.

i also accidentally found purvis street when we were at bras brasah. my sister bought the princess diaries and eragon. and morris, i know exactly how you feel when your wing mates found out about your blog. the men in my platoon found me on frienster much to my horror. wah lau. they think my hobbies very cheem too.

i'm going to write my own version of 31 songs (nick hornby) and continue to read quicksilver. page 174 already!

we saw michelle saram in the crumpler shop today, she's really tanned.
cool things i read about:

1. levi's new super stitch latin jeans. out next month. rad.
2. the modliving shop opposite raffles hotel. it's like a dream house come true. neon lit exterior. and the interior has my favorite colour scheme, black on black. always glamourous.
3. the most memorable movie character ever is marlon brando in the godfather.
4. tyra banks is trying to be the next oprah. i think the model reality show is even better than ai3.
5. martha stewart is going to jail. sob. i've always liked reading martha stewart's living. it's homemaking porno. stuff you always want but can never get.
6. jack, i would give one to you free.
7. graphic novels- blankets. mother, come home.
8. gossip rag trivia- remember kristie alley from veronica's closet? no you don't. she now weighs 136.5kg.

this week i wondered if i would be able to survive in the real world. would i be able to impress my boss and out wit other competitiors? or will i languish in non recognition. i've gotten too used to keeping a low profile. i wondered if i had changed much from my sec school days. sure, i talk a lot more cock now, but i'm still as insecure and undriven as ever. i realised i haven't changed from this time last year. i'm still failing my soc's like nobody's business and i still play with my hair. i still stone from time to time. i wonder if people will ever respect me. or if i'll ever find my true calling. or if i'll ever sell a t shirt to anyone. how much it takes to find love. how much it takes to accept myself for who i am.

polly jean harvey has a new album in summer. yipee..

hot hot hot! blood drenched cartoons to satiate the sadist in ya.

i dreamt about meeting sarah jessica parker in las vegas. i professed to be a big fan and then we went shopping for bear-shaped bag accessories. i've gotta give it to my subconscious for such nocturnal adventures.

i did guard 3ic on friday night and it was hell. first of all the guard 2 and i were supposed to takes shifts and man the desk, but he went to sleep instead and so i had to do everything from like 12 mn to 6am. the longest stretch i slept couldn't have been more than 10 mins. i had to, for example, help the prowlers send or draw their weapons ammo torch and signal every bloody hour, track their progress with the checkpoints, go out and un barricade the gate everytime a vehicle comes, and barricading it back was so difficult cuz it got stuck, and also issue passes to the kind canteen people, i say kind cuz they gave us lotsa free food the previous night. and then in the morning we all stood at the gate waiting for the chief of army to come. some lucky 3rd sergeant was his chauffer. i hope i don't get guard duty again.

billy crystal was as usual the funniest man at the oscars. the intro gig is actually available on kazaa.

doesn't life feel stagnant? i still can't book any driving pratical this month- the weekend slots are all taken. the music i listen to gets stale even faster. i'm now really into caetano veloso, who is a brazilian legend. he did a really chilled rendition of mj's billie jean. i quote this from the cd liner notes: "portuguese, english, italian, spanish, all those languages, the multiplicity of languages, which has always made me dream. i'll listen to them all, one after the other, and i'll tell myself 2 things. the first, that lacan was right, the subconscious knows all languages. when you hear this you realise it, for i understand everything he sings. the second, i'll say to myself: your life's been a failure, what you should have done was learn all languages, go on all the travels this guy's had, because he could speak to people. travels in the widest sense. when i think of caetano, it makes me dream. i don't know why. and that makes me live.."

i dream a lot too.. about silver jets, an ultra chic home, great clothes, places of glass and metal, and if that makes me live i must have led several lifetimes already. ok, it's a non-joke. i'm going off to watch queer as folk, which is the gay/les version of sex and the city.